Keith Richards will always be a legend for his music, but he will also be remembered for being the personification of a true rock star. Despite decades of complete disregard for moderation when using drugs and alcohol, Richards inexplicably continues to defy death. While he has always had a decadent reputation, he outdid himself this time. In comments published Tuesday, the 63-year-old Rolling Stones guitarist said he had snorted his father’s ashes mixed with cocaine.

“The strangest thing I’ve tried to snort? My father. I snorted my father,” Richards was quoted as saying by British music magazine NME.

“He was cremated and I couldn’t resist grinding him up with a little bit of blow. My dad wouldn’t have cared,” he said. “… It went down pretty well, and I’m still alive.”

Richards, who was No. 1 on the ‘who’s likely to die’ list for an entire decade, was “really disappointed” when he fell off the list.

Rock on, Keith.

* * UPDATE * *

So it turns out this story isn’t actually true (according to his manager), but it sounded legitimate enough. Allow me to atone for this mistake with a true story about Ozzy Osbourne. While on tour with Mötley Crüe, Ozzy got into a cocaine-snorting contest with their bassist Nikki Sixx. Once the blow was gone, he proceeded to snort a line of ants off of a popsicle stick. Did I mention this was at a hotel swimming pool and he was wearing one of Sharon’s sundresses? Anyways, the two then engaged in a gross-out contest, which ended in Ozzy licking Sixx’s urine off the cement. You won’t find these types of stories in the memoirs of Nickleback. I miss the days when rock stars actually lived the lifestyle.